Thursday, January 26, 2012

Her Charm

Another beautiful walk along Green Lake...

Documenting my love affair with moss

Sleeping Lovers

Last night, I was a bad girl. I can't be good all the time. It's in my DNA, just ask my grandma. Trust me, she'll know what I'm talking about. She's a little naughtier than me, and boy is it her charm. There is no one like her! Sometimes I need to turn on some soothing music, uncork a bottle of pino, pour a glass, take a deep breath, close my eyes and tell myself that everything will be okay. Last night I listened to Lana Del Ray. If you've never heard her sing, she's mesmerizing.

I keep chugging along, but I have little blurps of exhaustion. I'm in a blurp. I think it's related to the fact that I can't run. One more day. Ugh. One more day, except I stretched in my sleep, which quickly woke me up in a rip of pain. A little tear of the stitches which were healing so well. Damn. Tomorrow I'll gauge whether or not I should run. I don't want to get the incision infected. That would be disgusting!

If I can't run, I start to fall apart. I get lethargic, my appetite grows erratic, my mood dives, and I start to feel sad for no reason. It's embarrassing.

Today I started my high doses again. I'm doing a 4-6, four days of high doses twice a day and then six days off. On the dosing days, I can only eat between 11:00 am-ish to 4:00 pm-ish. No smoothies, the antioxidants clean out the free radicals that need to carry the artemisinin into the cancer cells. My fare during dosing days is quite simple. That's why I need to run, I need to feel energized. Green smoothies and running are what keep my blood flowing and happy.

Oh well. This will not last forever. I am lucky to have this opportunity to conquer my brain cancer. Most who have come before me have not been so fortunate. That's what I have to keep remembering. I'm a lucky one.


  1. "So Cal" PattiJanuary 26, 2012 at 4:22 PM

    Love your pictures from your beautiful Green Lake area! It is great that you have so much beauty and peace close by. I tend to be a bad girl at times too, but I admire your conviction to always get back on track. Enjoy your run when you can and keep on marching forward to conquer Herman!!!

  2. Any hills you can climb over and over and over? That might fit the bill for awhile. And girls that are good 100% of the time are boring. You are not boring, even though you are being soooo good 99.9% of the time.


Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...
Back to Top