Criminal Charges

Well, today is off to a great start! After playing tag with the Seattle assistant district attorney, she let me know that the city is in fact going to press charges in my attack case!! Apparently, the city receives over 200 new cases a week, and they were very clear from the start that there is no guarantee that charges would be pressed. This case has bounced around a bit, within the system, and I've had to give my statement several times. Each time it was hard, sad, and stirred quite a bit of emotions.

When I heard the news this morning, I thought I would be relieved, happy even, but instead I'm sad. The man who attacked me is married with four children. The oldest is 10 and the youngest is a set of infant twins. I did not intend to hurt his family, but in order to keep others safe I felt compelled to help the city press criminal charges. I know that this man has sexually accosted two other women, and he has become more and more aggressive. To attack a woman in her own home, working as her maintenance man, is incredibly brazen. This man should not be working in people's homes.

Anyway, I'm off to catch the bus for another counseling session. Alison is going to be THRILLED by this morning's news!!

Also, I included three photos from Saturday night. Throughout the night I was reminded of how wonderful our friends are. I am so glad that our buddy Eric got his job at the Blume Company, where he met Meghan who is married to Sean, who he then introduced to Dan, then Dan included me, and now Meghan and Sean have introduced us to all of THEIR friends, and Dan and I now have a huge network of fabulous buddies. There is no limit to the kindness of those around us, we are completely surrounded by love and support. And I know it's not just Seattle, it's Friday Harbor, Wenatchee, Poland, Sweden, and so many other places. Thank you! I am always grateful for all of the hugs and support. Especially with this upcoming clinical trail. I've been battling panic attacks, that's why I hadn't been posting lately. But, that's for another post, I've got to get running for the 358 or I'll be late!

Moving Out

Sorry I'm still not back to a regular posting schedule. Last Thursday, the counseling session was fantastic, and it prepared me emotionally for the appointment later in the day with the detective. The therapist helped me put the whole attack in perspective. I cried a good deal, and was able to discuss not only the attack, but also, all of the stress involved with our landlords. Unfortunately, we have to move. It has all been pretty unexpected, but step by step, it has become more and more uncomfortable to live here. All Danny and I want is a safe and happy home where we can focus on being healthy. We are moving out tomorrow. Each step of the way, dealing with our landlords, has been painful and sad. I wish I could say everything horrible that they've done, but I feel like it would be an ugly decision for me to make. There's no need for me to drag their names through the mud. They know what they've done, and how they've acted, and I'm not going to be able to teach them a lesson about kindness, empathy, or anything else. If there's one thing that I feel certain about, it's that you can't teach anyone anything. You can only be yourself, be honest, stand up for yourself, and avoid unnecessary stress/drama whenever possible.

Speaking of stress and drama, we've got only the good kind for the next two days. My parents will be here tonight, and we'll be packing today, then tomorrow we move out and into our new home. I have another counseling session tomorrow night, and I know that it will help me continue to heal. I feel like things are getting better and better. I feel relieved to get the therapy I need, the promise of a safe home with new landlords, time to heal and gain strength so that I can focus on  preparing for the clinical trial.

I need to be strong physically, mentally and emotionally. I must feel confident, yet relaxed and ready to conquer the world if I'm going to successfully undergo another brain surgery. For now I'm happy to I have the time to get back to walking the lake, then jogging the lake, focus on eating healthy, trying new recipes, stretching my limbs with yoga, and enjoying each moment of my amazing life. I'm so lucky, and happy to be alive. Even when things are tough, I'm still grateful to be breathing. Over the past few weeks, even at the lowest point, although I was scared, I just hoped and hoped that things would just get better. I day dreamed of jogging the lake, of laughing with friends, of walking to the grocery store and enjoying the little things of my daily life. All of those hopes, all of the wishing, culminated on Saturday night at our friends Laura & Eric's wedding. Finally, Dan and I were able to laugh, dance, visit with friends, enjoy the gorgeous day, the fresh air, the beautiful faces and happiness of their family and friends. It was perfect. Weddings are so much fun, especially when they're for people you love. Over the course of Saturday night I became more and more confident that Dan and I are going to pull through any hard times. I remembered that life isn't about the big things (cancer, the attack, the landlords, etc.), it's about hugs, laughter, stories, dancing, and love.

Message from Dan

Hello everyone, this is Dan

Since Jess was attacked on Tuesday, she has been dealing with a incredible amount of stress inducing situations. She has been dealing with; getting our locks changed, working with police officers and detectives on the pending criminal case of her attacker, scheduling her recently approved tests with UCLA to possibly start her clinical trial, scheduling her travel itinerary to UCLA, all the while going through the process of dealing with her attack.

Due to all this stress Jess had an aura on Thursday, followed by another on Friday. The two Auras happened while shopping for replacement items for the bathroom in an attempt to change the decor. All this has lead to me declaring a technological lock down and putting Jess on 'restriction'. She will not be allowed to blog, text or email until her level of stress has sufficiently decreased. Please do not take her lack of correspondence personally, it is a necessary action to preserve her health.

Jessica is extremely worn down and needs to let her body rejuvenate itself. I will be postponing her appointments at UCLA for one week. Hopefully this will give her enough time to start healing and speak to the detective handling the criminal case of her attacker on Friday.

Thank you for all of your support and sympathy for Jess, she will be back soon. Probably sooner then I wish.