Yesterday I was attacked in my shower by my maintenance man. I am terrified. The police are involved. I might not blog for a bit. Thank you for understanding.
Oh my goodness - I can't believe it. So sorry to hear it and the sad state of mind of some people. I hope you are able to get through all this and continue working towards the things you really need/want to focus on instead of senseless things like this. Hugs and good thoughts to you!
So sad to hear this Jess just when your future options are looking bright. It had to be terrifying but try not to give in to the terror and stay focused on getting well again! Sending loving thoughts your way!
Precious Jessica so sorry to hear what happened. You are a wonderful young lady who has stood strong through so much. Please do not let this evil person rob you of your strength & joy ! I cannot even imagine what you are experiencing. Just know dear one there are so many of us out here that love & care for you & your family even though we have never met in person. Love & Prayers
Jessica, I have been reading through your blog over the past few days(starting from the first post and trying not to skip ahead to where you currently are, your blog popped up out of nowhere on my daily google alerts for "brain tumor treatments") I too am a cancer patient (Stage IV melanoma since 2004) I have had two years of hospitalized chemotherapy, 2 lung surgeries (the whole left lung had to come out after the first biopsy after which I went on to have 6 craniotomies. 2 Stereotactic radiosurgeries and 2 patch radiations. I have also been reviewing your treatment options and decisions and so far you have been making all of the right decisions-especially avoiding radiation at all costs. When I saw this post today, I was completely blown away. I hope you are ok. When you are feeling better you can read the rest, or you can keep going and read on;
I think that your best decision would be to go for the vaccine at UCLA first for the following reasons.
1. Brain surgeries (aside from your complication) have become fairly common and safe. I am aware of one patient on the melanoma website that has had 8 this year. I have never had an awake brain surgery, but I have gotten used to them. Something tells me the surgeons at UCLA are even more experienced than the ones in Seattle. Most importantly is to find the best surgeon to prevent complications. Definitely ask around at UCLA.
2. The real upside to the vaccine decision, is the fact that it essentially debulks the tumor and will buy you more time in terms of tumor regrowth. Dendritic cell therapy not so much, you could potentially go through the whole therapy and just end up with a larger tumor-and still needing brain surgery if it doesn't work. 3. It will also help you to prime the pump (stimulate your immune system even more) should you use the dendritic cell therapy (you are exposed to antigens ahead of time). The other important point to consider is that although cancer cells can change and evolve over time, they usually don't change their tumor markers that the immune cells trained by your personalized vaccine would recognize.
I wish you well in your decision and as a disclaimer, I am not an oncologist.(this is the part where if I were, I would hand you a piece of paper with a bunch of small print in which somewhere it says you won't sue me and have you sign it). Don't forget to offer all of your Treatment options to Dr. Liau to see what her opinion is as well, and to see how she feels about the dendritic cell therapy in Germany?
So, sorry to vomit all this information all over your blog, in this time of distress, but I thought it might provide a nice distraction from your fears, and hopefully help you with your decisions, and keep you on the road to living a full and healthy life(even though it appears you already are up to this point)
Jessica... it is so difficult to regain balance after a traumatic event such as this...it requires nurture and healing therapy...your spirituality and the obvious love you are surrounded with will sustain you through this trial...know that each day I send loving energy your way during my morning reflection/connection with the spirit of goodness that resides with us.
Hi Jess- I sure miss your blog but totally understand your need for privacy right now. I hope that you are able to get back to a peaceful place where you can continue to move forward with your healing. Love you and think of you everyday!
Jess, I am so sorry this awful side of life intruded upon your positive energy, especially in light of all you are contemplating. I hope you are able to focus on all the pure love that surrounds you. You are truly blessed with one of the most loving, unselfish, group of family & friends I have had the honor of witnessing. May Gods love wash over you,; Hold firmly to the outward signs on earth of that love as represented by the family, friends, & strangers that pour out their love to you in His image. I pray for you each day & will continue. Love, Paula
OMG!!! I just can't believe it, what a nightmare. I am just sick that you went through that. Jess, pls know how sorry I am and am hoping you are OK and will be able to deal with this as you do everything in your life up to now and that is --- be positive, use that wonderful sense of humor, regain your strength, try to return your focus to the good news of being accepted for the trial at UCLA. And it is such great news!!! Congradulations on that, it sounds very promising!!! Jess, you are such an awsome young lady, you have inspired so many. You are such a blessing to this world. It's hard to know what to say to someone at a time like this, except you are in my prayers and hope you feel the love and peace I'm sending your way. I have no worries that your most awsome family and Dan are right there giving you what you need externally and they will do everything they can to help you heal internally. Love & Hugs Lisa Z.
Oh my goodness - I can't believe it. So sorry to hear it and the sad state of mind of some people. I hope you are able to get through all this and continue working towards the things you really need/want to focus on instead of senseless things like this. Hugs and good thoughts to you!
ReplyDeleteYou are in my prayers.
ReplyDeleteElaine
So sad to hear this Jess just when your future options are looking bright. It had to be terrifying but try not to give in to the terror and stay focused on getting well again! Sending loving thoughts your way!
ReplyDeleteOh Jess! I am so sorry. I can't even imagine. Love you.
ReplyDeletePrecious Jessica so sorry to hear what happened. You are a wonderful young lady who has stood strong through so much. Please do not let this evil person rob you of your strength & joy ! I cannot even imagine what you are experiencing. Just know dear one there are so many of us out here that love & care for you & your family even though we have never met in person.
ReplyDeleteLove & Prayers
Oh Jessica, I am so sorry to hear that. You are in my thoughts and prayers everyday. xoxo
ReplyDeletehow aweful!!!!! :( i love you big sis!!! sending hugs your way!!! xoxo
ReplyDeleteWhaaaaaat?!? Your home should be a place of safety and comfort. I am SO sorry!! If you want to get out or need a distraction, just let me know...
ReplyDeleteJess, I am so sorry to hear this. ;(
ReplyDeleteYou're doing the right thing to take a break from blogging and surround yourself with family and friends.
Use your energy and anger/frustration and pour it all into getting well!
Thinking of you.
Jessica, I have been reading through your blog over the past few days(starting from the first post and trying not to skip ahead to where you currently are, your blog popped up out of nowhere on my daily google alerts for "brain tumor treatments") I too am a cancer patient (Stage IV melanoma since 2004) I have had two years of hospitalized chemotherapy, 2 lung surgeries (the whole left lung had to come out after the first biopsy after which I went on to have 6 craniotomies. 2 Stereotactic radiosurgeries and 2 patch radiations. I have also been reviewing your treatment options and decisions and so far you have been making all of the right decisions-especially avoiding radiation at all costs. When I saw this post today, I was completely blown away. I hope you are ok. When you are feeling better you can read the rest, or you can keep going and read on;
ReplyDeleteI think that your best decision would be to go for the vaccine at UCLA first for the following reasons.
1. Brain surgeries (aside from your complication) have become fairly common and safe. I am aware of one patient on the melanoma website that has had 8 this year. I have never had an awake brain surgery, but I have gotten used to them. Something tells me the surgeons at UCLA are even more experienced than the ones in Seattle. Most importantly is to find the best surgeon to prevent complications. Definitely ask around at UCLA.
2. The real upside to the vaccine decision, is the fact that it essentially debulks the tumor and will buy you more time in terms of tumor regrowth. Dendritic cell therapy not so much, you could potentially go through the whole therapy and just end up with a larger tumor-and still needing brain surgery if it doesn't work.
3. It will also help you to prime the pump (stimulate your immune system even more) should you use the dendritic cell therapy (you are exposed to antigens ahead of time). The other important point to consider is that although cancer cells can change and evolve over time, they usually don't change their tumor markers that the immune cells trained by your personalized vaccine would recognize.
I wish you well in your decision and as a disclaimer, I am not an oncologist.(this is the part where if I were, I would hand you a piece of paper with a bunch of small print in which somewhere it says you won't sue me and have you sign it). Don't forget to offer all of your Treatment options to Dr. Liau to see what her opinion is as well, and to see how she feels about the dendritic cell therapy in Germany?
So, sorry to vomit all this information all over your blog, in this time of distress, but I thought it might provide a nice distraction from your fears, and hopefully help you with your decisions, and keep you on the road to living a full and healthy life(even though it appears you already are up to this point)
John Gallagher (east coast).
I'm so sorry! I love you! HUGS!!!
ReplyDeleteJessica... it is so difficult to regain balance after a traumatic event such as this...it requires nurture and healing therapy...your spirituality and the obvious love you are surrounded with will sustain you through this trial...know that each day I send loving energy your way during my morning reflection/connection with the spirit of goodness that resides with us.
ReplyDeletepeace to you
Hi Jess- I sure miss your blog but totally understand your need for privacy right now. I hope that you are able to get back to a peaceful place where you can continue to move forward with your healing. Love you and think of you everyday!
ReplyDeleteJess, I am so sorry this awful side of life intruded upon your positive energy, especially in light of all you are contemplating.
ReplyDeleteI hope you are able to focus on all the pure love that surrounds you. You are truly blessed with one of the most loving, unselfish, group of family & friends I have had the honor of witnessing.
May Gods love wash over you,; Hold firmly to the outward signs on earth of that love as represented by the family, friends, & strangers that pour out their love to you in His image. I pray for you each day & will continue. Love, Paula
holy crap!!! YIKES!! the maintenance man?! Seriously?! how horribly aweful... hope you are OK!!!
ReplyDeleteOMGosh! Honey I'm so sorry to hear that! Can I second (or third or one hundred eightith) Paula from July 14 please?
ReplyDeleteOMG!!! I just can't believe it, what a nightmare. I am just sick that you went through that.
ReplyDeleteJess, pls know how sorry I am and am hoping you are OK and will be able to deal with this as you do everything in your life up to now and that is --- be positive, use that wonderful sense of humor, regain your strength, try to return your focus to the good news of being accepted for the trial at UCLA. And it is such great news!!! Congradulations on that, it sounds very promising!!!
Jess, you are such an awsome young lady, you have inspired so many. You are such a blessing to this world. It's hard to know what to say to someone at a time like this, except you are in my prayers and hope you feel the love and peace I'm sending your way.
I have no worries that your most awsome family and Dan are right there giving you what you need externally and they will do everything they can to help you heal internally. Love & Hugs Lisa Z.